Question Time – Séamus Walsh is put on the spot.
Last Updated on Tuesday, 15 February 2011 11:18 Written by owen.ryan Tuesday, 15 February 2011 11:18
Question Time – Séamus Walsh is put on the spot.
Interview with Seamus Walsh, you probably know him from such things as… ….actually you probably dont know him at all.
Q1 Please state your name and date of birth for the record?
Séamus Xavier Bradley-Walsh, the lads call me Walshie. I was born in September 1980, thats all ye need to know.
Q2 Whats your favourite time of the day?
Thats a great question, ah probably the night time when Im asleep, all my worries just disappear, and I go to my imaginary place where I weigh 12 stone nottin and Jennifer Lopez is in love with me.
Q3 Theres been a lot of talk about your sisters, how do you feel about that?
I dont want to talk about it, touch em and Ill burn your house down and then spit on the ashes, and you know I will.
Q4 I understand your goin to college in UL, whats a normal week like?
The scutter and the misery you wouldnt believe, broke at the minute, survived on 4 euro last week. When I went out on Thursday Night I had to drink beer others left behind, sure you get the looks but its worth it. I missed a few lectures there alright, cause Macdara forgot to wake me up and The Rooster (Hicks) had left at daybreak.
For food, brought everything bar the kitchen sink from home, course I’m on a diet at the moment so 324 cases of food was enough. Have a final year thesis due shortly and nottin done, tryin to get up on the project co-ordinator so she’ll cut me some slack. Joined the gym this year, Eamon and Mac made me, was injured there for a week, put up 2 stone, my trainer says it thrun me back 9 weeks.
Q5 Is there any women in your life?
Ya, I think I got signals from this one in the hurlers duther nite, said she “liked the cut o’ me”, course I responded with, love your sclamatas, and a wink. We didnt do anything cause I like to take things slowly, build a good foundation, maybe Ill get to touch off her by accident next week, who knows maybe some day we’ll hold hands. I think shes different from the rest, all the others seem to use me for my body and treat me like dirt.
Q6 The pen pictures brought about a lot of humour, how do you do it?
Thanks, ah I’ve great people to work with, the likes of Andy Bourke, sher I didnt know where to stop, he creates material for me every time he opens his mouth. Ive got to know Andy really well through an interview there lately and I think he’s smelly. As well as that hes a cuddly bear underneath his hardman image.
I’d like to say to Andy you dont have to pretend to be like that to be popular.
Q7 Tell us about yourself Seamus?
Im a lonely male seeking friendship with another male, preferably a man. I’d also like if they had the same interests but its not necessary cause I’m not fussy.
Q8 Who are your heroes?
Besides the miniature ones Id have to say Pablo Picasso, really like his work, as well Andy Bourke ’cause I saw him cut a lad open one day and he wasnt even sorry, very impressed, we need more like him in our club if we are to get anywhere this year.
Q9 Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
You f**kin ejit you asked me that already. Its still the same thing although il have another stab at it. Id love to win the lotto. God if I had money id probably go into the magazine business. I love porn.
Q10 Whos your favourite artist?
Same as the hero one, Poablo Picasso, jaysus these questions are stupid. If you have a look at the interviews I carried out youd get a proper framework for how to do this sort of thing. In a University, we learn lots of stuff like this, you probably went to an institute of technology!! Ya Uni is great, its refined my character, Its shaped the very being before you today, I’ve grown up and I feel ready to face the world.
Q11 What kind of career goals have you got?
So long as there are hot women in the work place, it will be fine. Im aware of these stupid discriminatory laws around these days so I have to mind what I say and who I feel. My real goal would be to **** the ***** off every bird in the office right away, and then have a laugh about it with the lads for the rest of the year.
Sign-off Thanks a lot for taken the time out Seamus.
No problem, babes will probably want me after readin this when they see the true Seamus. Its like before in Uni when I bate the women away from me with my hurley, only that was because I robbed their underwear from their clotheslines.
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